Not With a Bang
by ErikaDiLante
Summary: Loving Mac Taylor isn't easy, virtually every woman who has crossed his path knows this, but the women of Mac's past think Jo Danville might just be up to the job.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N** : Hey everyone! So this is my first foray into the CSI Fandom, but I'm absolutely in love with Mac and Jo's relationship. I'm super bummed that the series ended before their relationship could really repair itself, and after tptb said that Mac and Jo were going to get married, I wanted to write this little piece. I hope you enjoy it!

Also, I'm considering either a second chapter or a follow up, but I'm not sure. Let me know what you think?

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Mac Taylor's relationship with Christine Whitney had ended the same way it began: quietly. There was no messy breakup, no wallowing on either side, just a slight uptick in surliness from a typically surly man. The team knew Mac well enough to deduce something was wrong, but no one dared ask him. They were scared, but whether that fear was of getting snapped at or fear of seeing the cracks in that normally stoic facade breaking into a gaping chasm, was unclear.

Jo knew. Aside from Sid, she was pretty sure she was the first to know. Despite his warning to stay out of his personal life, Jo always kept an eye on him. Once you decoded his language, Mac Taylor was incredibly easy to read. Jo always kept an eye on him. Once you decoded his language, Mac Taylor was incredibly easy to read. Jo had known when they'd gotten engaged, when Christine had moved out, and now, finally, she knew it was over.

A part of her felt a little bit relieved, not just because she'd finally admitted (after much prodding from Ellie and Lindsay, a combination Jo was sure could pull water from a stone) she had feelings for him, but because she just knew they weren't right for each other. Mac was about as closed off as it was possible for one person to be. He needed someone who could get him to open up, even a little bit, and Christine had admitted herself that getting him to do so was like pulling teeth. Jo thought back to their conversation in the hospital:

"Sounds to me like you're his emergency contact."

Jo had hated herself so much for saying all of that. Declaring her love for Mac in front of his girlfriend? It was wildly inappropriate and Jo had spent weeks afterwards berating herself for such a slip of composure.

"Jo," a soft voice spoke from the doorway of her office. The brunette snapped her head up, surprised to see none other than Mac's now ex-fiancee hesitating in the entryway.

"Christine," she exclaimed, limbs flying in a cacophony of sound and motion as she moved to adopt a professional posture. In another time and place, they might have been friends, but Mac had drawn a line in the sand between his personal and professional lives, and he'd made it very clear Jo wasn't allowed to cross it. So when she saw Christine standing there, smiling at her, she wasn't entirely sure how to respond. "If you're looking for Mac, he's down in autopsy. I could have him paged if you want, it'll just take a sec..."

"Actually, I'm here to see you." There was a silence for a moment as Jo tries to process this. She'd been trying to live by Mac's rules, despite how much pain it caused her, and yet here was Christine, blatantly tossing them aside like they didn't even exist.

"Me," Jo repeated, fingers fiddling with the lowest hanging necklace around her neck.

"Yeah. Is that okay? If it's a bad time, I can come back or..."

"No, no it's fine! Just um...come on in and ignore the mess." A small smile graced Christine's face and Jo noted, not for the first time, just how striking she was. She hated women who saw others as competition, thought it did nothing but feed into misogynistic ideals and practices she'd fought her whole life to get away from. So her admiration of the other woman wasn't tinged with jealousy, just a hint of longing for her life at Christine's age.

"Mac always said you were the queen of post-it notes. I see that wasn't an exaggeration." Jo laughed despite herself. She liked Christine, she really did. She was charming and witty and smart as hell, characteristics Jo admired in anyone, male or female.

"Well Mac isn't typically prone to exaggeration. With most things you can usually take his word for it, and if it's about himself you can almost always guess he's underplaying it. Believe me, this is nothing. Lindsay just made me purge since she found one on her side of the office this morning."

"Hey, they're colorful, I like it."

"Thanks." They fell into silence for another moment before Jo spoke again. "So what can I do for you? Is everything okay?"

"Oh yeah, it's great. I just um...I wanted to talk to you...about Mac."

"Oh," Jo managed, "okay. What about him?"

"Well I realize this might be overstepping my bounds, but I was wondering if you and Mac had...worked things out yet?"

"Worked things out?"

"Yeah. He told me he snapped at you awhile back and..." She let out a breath, and that was when Jo finally noticed it: Christine looked nervous.

"Hey..." Jo's voice was kind as she reached out a hand and gently covered Christine's with her own. "If this is about you telling him I talked to you, I don't care. He would have found out eventually, and he would have been just as mad."

"That's the thing though. He wasn't mad, and I know he told me that, but something tells me he hasn't told you." Jo was silent for a moment. She still remembered every detail of their conversation that day.

"I'm only going to tell you this once...be careful where you stick your nose...stay out of my personal business."

After that, she'd pulled away. She still watched over him, still cared, but only from a distance.

"Oh, Christine, I..."

"No, listen. We might have stopped seeing each other, but I still care about him, and he needs you, Jo, you know that don't you?"

"Mac Taylor doesn't need anybody."

"Oh come on." The look Christine gave her was kind, but slightly patronizing, in the way a kindergarten teacher looks at an unruly student. "Jo, he loves you."

"No he doesn't." Okay Josephine, that denial was a little too quick. "Look, Christine, I see what you're trying to do, but Mac's made it very clear that he doesn't want me in..."

"Mac made a mistake. He might be all rough and tough on the outside, but we both know he's still human, no matter how much he might pretend not to be. I seem to remember a really smart woman telling me something similar once." Jo laughed. That conversation at the cafe seemed so long ago, practically a lifetime.

"Really? Cause that woman sure feels like an idiot right now."

"Why? Because you fell in love with your boss? And don't," Christine insisted when she saw Jo was about to say something, "don't try to tell me you're just friends. I saw it in the hospital, Jo, how much he meant to you, and now that I know what he looks like when he's in love, I know he feels the exact same way about you." She sighed softly and tucked some hair behind her ears. "Look, I'm not here to tell you what to do. I don't think I have that right. I just wanted to tell you that being loved by Mac Taylor is...exquisite, and if I were you I wouldn't be so quick to throw it away."

"So...what is it you're asking me to do exactly?"

"Follow your heart. That's why you two work so well together. He likes to think he's all logic all the time, but he feels things very deeply. You bring that out of him, bring it a little closer to the surface, and I think a sensitive Mac Taylor is good for everyone."

"Christine, I..."

"Jo." Her tone was insistent, and this time it was amusement Jo saw in her eyes. "Seriously, just make a move. It's the 21st century. Women can ask men out. Besides." She hopped off her perch on Jo's desk and gave the older woman a wink. "We both know Mac likes a woman in control." With that, she turned on her heel and headed for the door, only stopping to say one last thing in parting. "Jo?"

"Yeah?"

"It's okay to be happy."

Jo would spend a long time trying to figure out what Christine meant by that, but for now, her thought process was short circuited by Mac walking into her office. He looked over his shoulder, brow furrowed in confusion as he watched the flash of blonde hair turn around the corner.

"Jo?"

"Yeah?"

"Was that..."

"Yup." She was still staring at the doorway, not even fully registering Mac's presence. Could she really be happy? Could they be happy? Together?

"What did she want?" Jo took a deep breath, shook her head, and, finally making eye contact for what felt like the first time in forever, answered.

"I have absolutely no idea."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N** : Hey everybody! So I just wanted to say thank you for the AMAZING response to this story! I really wasn't expecting it, and I'm totally honored and flattered. Since you liked it so much and were so incredibly supportive, I decided to make this a multi-chapter fic. Shouldn't be too long, but I figured the least I could do was let you guys see our lovely OTP get together.

Regarding this chapter: Stella's in it. As with Christine, I just get really sad that the women in Mac's life seem to be pitted against each other. I really wanted to write Stella and Jo meeting and actually being friends and, as you'll see in both this chapter and the next, giving Jo her blessing for the blossoming relationship she has with Mac. That being said, I haven't watched Stella episodes in years, so please forgive me if she sounds ooc. I did my best!

Thanks again for your support, I adore you all!

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The crisp air of New York City felt different than the sticky sweetness of New Orleans. That was the first thing Stella noticed when she stepped out of the airport. Thankfully, years of New York living weren't easily undone by a few years of sun, so she wasn't underdressed, but there was still a chill in the air she had to re-acclimatize too.

She felt bad that she hadn't come sooner. She heard Mac had left the crime lab and the come back, that he'd been shot and nearly died. She felt like a crappy best friend, but things had been so hectic at her new job, and even after a year she hadn't felt settled in enough to just drop everything and head back north.

She was here now though, and that's what mattered. When the elevator opened to the 35th floor, a smile was already on her face. She was looking forward to seeing everyone again, and she hoped the mysterious Jo Danville, who had taken her position, would be there as well. She'd only heard bits and pieces about Jo from her former co-workers, but Stella gathered she'd like her. The smile on Lindsay's face when she talked about Jo's relationship with Mac was enough to win Stella over.

The first sight to greet her was hardly a strange one. She let out a soft sigh and knocked on the familiar office door, where one Mac Taylor was staring very intensely at a file folder, or at least pretending to. Stella knew him well enough to know when he was actually paying attention to something and when he was distracted. Right now, he was most definitely distracted. At her knock, his head snapped up and he made a very silly effort to look like he was working until he saw it was her. When he realized who exactly was in his doorway, Stella was gifted with a rare smile. He instantly rose from his seat and moved to pull her into a tight hug.

"Mac Taylor," Stella laughed, "aren't you a sight for sore eyes!"

"Yeah," Mac chuckled in reply, "I could say the same for you. What are you doing here?"

"Well I came to New York for a conference, and I figured I couldn't be all the way up here without visiting my favorite geeks!"

"Well the team'll be happy to see you."

"And I'll be happy to see them. And I want to meet Jo." She was surprised to see his face drop when she mentioned his new partner. From what Lindsay had told her, Mac and Jo got along swimmingly. At first, the idea of someone getting along with Mac as well as she did hurt, but then, after the pain of leaving faded, she became increasingly grateful that the woman who filled her job was able to do it's unofficial duties as well. "What," she asked, "afraid we're gonna gang up on you and make you actually eat for once?"

"I…no," he murmured, and Stella knew something was wrong. Most of the rest of the team couldn't tell one surly expression from another, but part of the job requirement was being able to read Mac's expressions.

"Okay then, what's up? Trouble in paradise?" His wince was a lot more revealing than he probably thought it was. "Oh," Stella murmured, a grin appearing on her face despite herself, "I didn't realize you and Ms. Danville were…"

"What? Stella, we're not…Jo and I aren't…why are you looking at me like that?" The smirk stayed plastered to Stella's face as she crossed her arms and just leveled him with a stare, and just like Stella knew Mac, Mac knew Stella. He knew her 'I told you so' look when he saw it. "Stella, we're not."

"Uh-huh. Your face tells a different story, my friend. You like her, don't you?" He hesitated a moment before Stella laughed and shook her head.

"Mac, you can accept it. I'm not going to be offended because you have the hots for your new partner."

"Do you have to say it like that?"

"Why? Does my implying you have a sex life really bother you, or is it more so the fact you're now picturing having a sex life with Jo."

"Stel…"

"Mac, I got the results on that…oh, I'm sorry." Jo stopped awkwardly in the doorway when she saw Mac wasn't alone. She tilted her head when her appearance seemed to provoke a practical allergic reaction in Mac, his face going bright red. The woman with him looked like she was about to burst with laughter. She felt sneakingly like Lindsay must have when she walked in on her and Russ's conversation back during her first year at the Crime Lab.

"Don't be sorry," the woman said, which was probably good, considering Mac seemed to be struggling for words even more than usual. "I was actually just interrogating Mac about you. I'm Stella Bonasera. It's really really nice to finally meet you."

Jo's jaw dropped slightly. The Stella Bonasera? A thousand thoughts flew through her head and she got so caught up in wondering what Stella's presence met, she almost forgot to shake the hand Stella had offered to her. "Right…sorry. I've just heard so much, it's a bit strange to see you here in person."

"Oh believe me, I know the feeling. Every time I ask about you, I just hear rave reviews."

"Really? I can't imagine why."

"Well because you're good at your job, girl! You don't have to be modest. Everyone here has already tooted your horn plenty." For the second time in a strangely short period, Jo found herself laughing with the woman who used to chiefly occupy Mac Taylor's heart. She'd imagined meeting Stella a thousand times, and none of them had been as amicable and…dare she say pleasant as this. She was snapped out of her reverie when she felt an arm slip around her shoulders. She was surprised to see it was Stella's.

"Mac, I'm taking your beautiful second in command out for lunch and we're going to talk about lots of things that have nothing to do with you." Jo's smile just grew and, now that the icy confusion of her initial surprise was wearing off, she could garner her reactions better. Her arm slipped around Stella's waist in response and she flashed Mac her best Southern Belle grin. For his part, Mac was pretty much gobsmacked.

"I," he started, before the women turned on her heels and sauntered towards the elevator. Mac sunk into his chair and ran his hands over his face as he watched them go. "What the hell have I gotten myself into?"

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 **A/N** : Again, thank you all so much for reading! The next chapter will contain Stella and Jo's lunch! I'll do my best to get it up promptly!


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N** : Hey everyone! Sorry this chapter took me so long to crank out! My CSI:NY muse kinda went off on a vacation for awhile, but it's back now so hopefully the rest of this will be much more promptly uploaded!

Thank you so much for the support of this story! You're all incredible!

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Jo Danville didn't scare easily. She was a strong, capable woman who faced down death and the ugliest side of human nature on a regular basis, but now that she was alone with Stella Bonasera, she felt her insides shaking. The woman had an infectious energy to her, and she could tell the southern air had been doing her good, but she was still a bit unclear on what exactly they were doing here. Stella told Mac it was to get to know each other, but she could see the expectant way Stella held herself, like she had something very specific she wanted to talk about.

They sat in silence while they looked over the menu, but once their orders were placed, there was nothing left but Stella's smirk and Jo's uncertainty. Jo made to speak first, hoping to get out in front of any confrontation or awkwardness before it happened.

Stella beat her to it, resting her chin on her hands and, with a smirk, dropping a bombshell of a question. "So, you and Mac…what's going on, huh?"

"What?" Jo was stunned. She'd expected Mac to come up at some point in this conversation, but the fact that he was the first topic Stella brought up served to increase her nerves. She knew Stella and Mac had been close. Was this the part where Stella chewed her out for not taking care of him enough? After all, watching over Mac was one of the most important parts of the Assistant Supervisor position. It was why Sinclair had a tendency to hire people who could serve as a foil to the enigmatic, surly Mac Taylor.

Stella smiled and held up her hands. "Relax, I'm not here to step on your territory or anything. Mac's a good friend, my best friend even, but my life is in a different place now."

Jo blinked once, then twice, then a third time. "I….I'm sorry…maybe I'm just having a slow day here but…why is that…"

"Look…" Stella sighed, and Jo could tell that they were about to get into the real conversation, the reason Stella had invited her out in the first place. "I might not know you very well, but I know Mac Taylor, and you could practically cut the tension in that office with a knife. Something happened between you. I've been here all of two hours and even I can tell that."

"It's not…" Jo was torn between telling Stella her relationship with Mac was none of her business and begging her for help. The list of people who knew Mac as well as they did was very short, and Stella's help could be invaluable, but admitting the things that were troubling to her to someone she barely knew…she might have put on a friendly face, but Jo was really quite a private person. She wasn't sure if she was ready to discuss the very deep feelings she had for her boss. She leaned forward and buried her face in her hands. "It's complicated."

"Well of course it is," Stella laughed, "it's Mac! That man couldn't do simple if his life depended on it. So what happened? Did you kiss? Sleep together? And now it's awkward?"

"No! I…it's nothing like that! We just…I don't know. It was one of those things where…it was like I blinked and he was angry with me."

Stella nodded knowingly. "Ah the seemingly impenetrable Mac Taylor defense system. Believe it or not, it means you're actually getting close."

"Really? Because it feels like ever since then, we've just drifted further apart."

"Yeah, that happens sometimes. It's kind of like…you know how sometimes when you're sick, you feel a hundred times worse just before you get better? That's what it's like with Mac. He's not good at letting people in, but he's got such a big heart that when he connects with a person, he can't help it. And it scares him, so he lashes out."

"Scares him? Scares him? What about me? I'm terrified! Everything was so easy before, but now…"

"You know, it took me a long time to learn this, but when it comes to Mac Taylor, if your relationship is easy, you don't have much of a relationship. If you're fighting, sucky and terrifying as it is, it means he's letting you in Jo. Sometimes he's just too stubborn to see it."

Jo pursed her lips, falling silent for a moment. She could see Stella's point. In fact, if she hadn't been so emotionally invested, she probably would have told herself the same thing.

"Look," Stella murmured, reaching across the table to grasp Jo's hand, "whenever I'd ask the others about you, one of the first things to come up was always your ability to crack Mac open a bit. At first I thought they were just trying to reassure me, convince me that my leaving wasn't going to send Mac into some sort of tailspin, but being here, seeing you two in person, I actually think they were underplaying it."

"So what do I do then? It's like he froze me out and I don't…I don't know how to find my way back in."

"Did you guys ever go down to that burger joint on 21st and Lex?"

"Yeah, of course. You think Mac could ever stay away from there for long?"

"Ask him out. Take him somewhere casual and just…talk to each other. I know he avoids serious conversation like the plague, but if you suck him into a casual setting and then drop it on him, he can't escape."

Jo smiled. "You make it sound like we're staging some sort of air strike."

"Well, let's be honest, getting that man to open up might as well be a full scale military operation." They both descended into laughter then and this time, when the silence came, it was amicable and easy.

"You know," Jo said, taking a moment to look into her coffee before meeting Stella's eyes for the first time. "I was worried about meeting you."

"Me? What about you? I spent months hearing all about how awesome you are! I was terrified!"

Jo shook her head. "We should've known, huh? If we can handle Mac Taylor, we can certainly handle a like-minded woman."

"Seriously. And Jo? I want you to know…if you ever need some backup, even if it's just a sounding board…" She handed over a card with an extra phone number scrawled on the back. "Call me, okay?"

Jo just looked at the card for a moment before a bright smile etched itself onto her face. "You know Mac's gonna have a coronary when he hears we're friends now."

"Isn't that a bonus?"

In their entire conversation, Stella didn't mention the feelings she saw blossoming between Jo and their mutual friend, but she didn't have to. Jo felt reassured knowing that, should anything like the aphasia incident happen again, she wouldn't be alone this time. And now that she wasn't terrified of losing the man she'd come to care so much about, Jo felt confident moving forward, whatever form that might take.

"Thank you," she murmured, squeezing Stella's hand lightly. The other woman smiled and shook her head.

"Hey, what are friends for?"

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 **A/N** : There you go! I hope you all liked it! I'll do my best to get the next chapter up quickly!


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